THE SKINNY - The City That Never Sleeps
By Stef Skinner



Given the influx of fashion and street-style blogs, so much emphasis is placed on putting together your best daytime and “going out” looks, and we never really think about the nights we just plan on vegging out at home.

What began as my perfect kind of New York night — a rare date with my couch, DVR, and the finest takeout the East Village had to offer, courtesy of Seamless — turned into a “what were you thinking getting dressed in the dark?” situation.

The timeline of events went something like this:

1:30 a.m.

A faint knock on my front door… but I think nothing of it, since my dog doesn’t even flinch.

2:30 a.m.

The doorbell to my actual apartment rings — no way in hell I’m getting up. Who would it be at this hour? (Insert minor panic, but back to bed.)

3:50 a.m.

Knocking and door bell ringing happen at the same time. Sadie, my guard dog (or lack thereof), doesn’t even bark. I am so scared, the elastic on my finest fat pants nearly burst.

4:00 a.m.

I call my best friend, Ingrid. We have a pact that we are each other’s +10 emergency friend — the call you always answer no matter what hour it is. During this time we talk about an aggressive vs. non-aggressive knock, and determine the recent events to be “non- aggressive,” and then…

4:50 a.m.

…my bell is aggressively ringing…15 times in a row. I shakily whisper to Ingrid, “please call the police.”

 

Trembling, I look out the window. A fire truck and squad cars are pulling up to the “scene” as I stand there in my mismatched pajamas, hair in a panic-stricken bun, and pale as a ghost. I open my door to find my neighbor in his bathrobe. He tells me he had called the fire department, and I tell him I’d called the police.

Turns out a pipe had burst, and the entrance of our building was flooding. The knocking and banging wasn’t someone coming to attack me; it was someone trying to figure out what was happening. Then low and behold, my bathroom is covered in water.

Being single in the city, they say you should always look your best because you never know who or what is around the corner. Like when a group of very good-looking police officers and firemen pop up in your apartment, for example, and you look half homeless with just the right amount of disheveled.

Here is what I learned from my “relaxing” evening at home:

  • Just because you are behind closed doors doesn’t mean you are always going to be alone.
  • Maybe the “off duty” look shouldn’t just be applied to a relaxed street-style outfit, but also to your off-night wardrobe.
  • The Housewives and Kardashians always look perfect before bed and right when they wake up. It’s probably better to be one of those “fresh-faced” people so you look great around the clock.
  • Invest in grown-up pajama sets that do not consist of my Class of ‘97 shirt from the eighth grade and elastic bottoms that have moved with me since my freshman year of college.
  • Make more plans, or maybe it’s time to hit the dating scene.
  • Start a pajama-inspired blog that is not just informative, but authoritative.